I’m just baffled. Part of me wants to know what the hell she’s singing about, part of me thinks it would ruin things. This is amazing though; the CG monsters, the set, the faceless fat dancers, and the creppy-cute lead singer who farts static out of her ass. If I met an alien, and wanted him to understand what Japan was, I’d show him this video.

And then we’d all be boned.

Morning music videos: “Ponponpon” [I ♥ Chaos]

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I don’t know if I’m turned on or creeped out. Both, I think.

Creepy Lip Sync Contestant Totally WTF! (Philippines) [Youtube]

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“Like tribbles we’ll cuddle day and night…”

Oh seriously, could she be any more adorable? The little hip-hop break in the middle is pretty hilarious too. Goddess, it’s good to be a geek.

Morning music videos: “Star Trek Girl” [I ♥ Chaos, via NerdBastards]

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I don't even... What?

brown cardigan | 2967 [brown cardigan]

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In the 80s, China looked upon the superpowers with a combination of fear and envy, desperately wishing to be as modern and successful as their space-faring rivals. Chinese Posters shows us the results of this, fanciful images showing small children and cute animals soaring the skies in improbably adorable spacecraft, carrying toys and gifts for all, being smiled upon by the gods on the Bridge of Haaven. Hit the jump for two more cutely bizarre images.

Taikonaut babies of China’s space age [io9, via Chinese Posters via Metafilter]

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A wonderfully clever mash-up of the H2G2 and Doctor Who. Don’t Panic, you say? Fuck that, I’m gonna do my best Looney Tunes imitation and run through a damn wall if I see a freakin’ Dalek.

Though, it you throw your towel over their eyestalk, you will have a significantly better chance of surviving. Just a little hint there for ya.

The Hitchhiker’s Guide Reminds You Not to Panic if You Meet a Dalek [Topless Robot]

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Oh, come on, you know the one. It was just on TV last night…

Leela: They’re going to destroy the entire Earth if they don’t see some stupid TV show about some bimbo lawyer?
Fry: It’s crazy! How could they even know about a show from a thousand years ago?
Farnsworth: Well, Omicron Persei 8 is about a thousand light years away. So the electro-magnetic waves would just recently have gotten there. You see–
Fry: Magic. Got it.

Man, do you think Zeta Reticuli is gonna be pissed when they see the Sleestaks?

The Aliens of the Star Iota Horologii Are Just Watching Captain Kangaroo Now [Gizmodod via AbstruseGoose]

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This is an interesting little article. A collection of excerpts from various interviews where different comic book artists talk about real-life encounters with their characters. I’ve seen a few of these before, but they’re well worth reading again. One of my favourites comes from Alan Moore:

One day, I was in Westminster in London — this was after we had introduced the character — and I was sitting in a sandwich bar. All of a sudden, up the stairs came John Constantine. He was wearing the trenchcoat, a short cut — he looked — no, he didn’t even look exactly like Sting. He looked exactly like John Constantine. He looked at me, stared me straight in the eyes, smiled, nodded almost conspiratorially and then just walked off around the corner to the other part of the snack bar.

I sat there and thought, should I go around that corner and see if he is really there, or should I just eat my sandwich and leave? I opted for the latter; I thought it was the safest. I’m not making any claims to anything. I’m just saying that it happened.

Go through the whole thing, you’ll find it well worth the read.

Superman is Real [Electric Children]

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I don’t really have much clever to say about this one; it’s a fucking beautiful video, a delightful track, and it just makes me smile.

Space Invaders are happy up there in Royksopp’s new music vid [Joystiq]

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This is lots of fun. Taking all the scenes with R2-D2 from the excreble Star Wars: Episode One, a fellow by the name of MeanestBear has managed to wring some amusement from the biggest disappointment of 1999. As a bonus, you can also remind yourself of how gaddamn fucking annoying Jar Jar was, and roll your eyes at young Anakin’s “piloting” skills. Fun for the whole family!

VOTD: R2-D2 Subtitled [/film, via DailyWhat]

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Now, it should come as no surprise to you that many hard-core fetish people are also nerds. It fascinates me sometimes how the interests roll together, like a couple of E’d up ravers on a bed with fluffy blankets. Honestly, I’m amazed something like this hasn’t come to my attention before, but it’s gorgeous. I mean, just look at it! Can’t you just see Dr. Crusher getting off shift to change into something less comfortable and play Number One with Picard? Meee-rowr! It certainly helps that the model is a hottie. Oh, those are some lovely friends she has there…

NERDGASM [PopPornBlog, via Etsy]

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Such a wonderfully cool thing this is. A fellow named Paul “Otaking” Johnson has, all by himself, done up some footage for an anime-inspired Doctor Who cartoon. Specifically starring the Third Doctor, it shows his dandyness kicking ass with Venusian Aikido and fighting both Daleks and some ridiculously neat looking Cybermen. Please, someone, somewhere, make this a reality!

Doctor Who…the Anime [Topless Robot, via Japanator]

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I do love the novelty and variety that the modern criminal can provide us with nowadays. From the Colorado News:

Colorado Springs police are looking for a man who hit two 7-Eleven convenience stores early Wednesday, armed with a Klingon sword.

The first robbery was reported at 1:50 a.m., at 145 N Spruce St. The clerk told police a white man in his 20s, wearing a black mask, black jacket, and blue jeans, entered the store with a weapon the clerk recognized from the Star Trek TV series.

The robber demanded money and left with an undisclosed amount.

A half hour later, police received a call from a 7-Eleven at 2407 N. Union Blvd., where a man matching the previous description entered the store with a similar weapon. He also demanded money from the store clerk. The clerk refused and the robber “transported” himself out of the store on foot.

Love it love it love it. Dude robs two 7-11s in the same night with a god-damn bat’leth. How stupid/awesome is that? More importantly, how many people who live in Colorado Springs have one of the damn things? He’ll probably be arrested in his mom’s basement by the weekend.

Masked Man Robs Stores With Klingon Sword [TheDenverChannel.com]

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I could make a pithy comment about this, but it’s really just too awesome.

Darth Vader Plays The Violin! [YouTube]

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imply fascinating, as the good Mr. Spock might say. Vintage images from a Kaiju art book showing anatomical cutaways of some of our favourite giant monsters. Apparently Godzilla’s flame breath comes from “a “uranium sack” and “nuclear reaction sack” that produce radioactive fire-breath and energize the body.” That’s pretty swift, if you ask me. Mothra and Anguirus are tucked below the cut. Follow the link to the originator for more, including Gamera!

Kaiju Anatomy: Internal Organs that Allow Giant Monsters to Breathe Fire [io9.com, via Pink Tentacle, via modern_fred]

Mothra’s big weapon is its’ “elongated silk-producing organ.” Heh heh. Elongated organ…

Look, Anguiras has extra brains, just for his legs! Amazing. I mean, he’s still stupid as all hell, but he has extra brains for those stubby little legs of his!

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God getting on your back? Satan won’t stop calling you? David Letterman keeps peering in your windows to watch you change? Keep them away the easy way with a Paranormal Restraining Order. At only $5 a pop, these babies are a steal for sure-fire protection against the above mentioned entities, as well as constant pests like extra-terrestrial visitors, Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster, and even the Grim Reaper himself! Check ‘em out, and tell them Uncle Frank sentcha!

Paranormal Restraining Orders

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