Okay, so I’ve seen a lot of weird hand-made fan stuff in my time on this here series of tubes we call the interblag. I’ve also seen a lot of sexy cool stuff too. This, however, this… this shit just creeps me right the fuck out. What kind of batshit crazy mentality do you have to have to make a felt re-creation of Bella’s womb, complete with mutant vampire fetus? Look at that thing! Someone put a lot of time and effort into making it. Look how delicately they’ve formed the creepy little fetus. My gods people. If you could put this kind of drive and industry towards something like, say, curing cancer, we’d all live forever.

Just like your precious little sparkly vampires. Think about that.

You Need Help: Bella’s Womb From Twilight [Geekologie, via Cinematical]

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This is both sad and hilarious. An anonyblog for female bad sex survivors, I bang the worst dudes is made of of censor-barred images and brief anecdotes of poor sexual performance by males. The funny comes from the fact that a lot of these tales are dreadfullly droll, and you’re realy sorry that anyone had to go through that. The sad is closely related; it’s absolutely horrible that some of these girls got into the situations described. Take this highlight for example:

This guy would demand oral sex repeatedly and when I finally relented he tried to face-humped me like a rabbit.

Why would you finally give in? Why would you even keep hanging out with the guy? Tolerating his presence indicates to him that his behaviour is acceptable; giving in rewards his for his bothersome persistence. The fact that none of them accept any blame for the badness brings it a bit into the male-bashing perspective, but a bit of misandry is good for the soul, they tell me. Interesting, Firefox recognizes “misogyny”, but not “misandry”. Heh. Funny that.

Anyhow, it’s certainly worth taking your time to scroll through; there’s only eleven pages or so at this point, though I’m sure that’ll grow. I must say I question how many of the photos are genuine, and how many are just some random guy blacked out to the point of being unrecognizable, but they do add a certain pleasing visual style to the whole thing. Just don’t be surprised if some of the stories read more bitter than clever.

I bang the worst dudes (sorry mom) [via the blazing shark]

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Sometimes, just when I think that things can’t get any weirder (and that doesn’t happen too often), I get that reality slap to the face which tells me that it’s just getting started. I show you now “Drank”, the worlds first (to my knowledge) anti-energy drink. It’s grape soda with valerian root and melatonin, and according to the Wikipedia is based on an urban cocktail which involves mixing codeine-and-promethazine-based cough syrup with Sprite and Jolly Ranchers. Popularized by some idiot named “Dj Screw”, who wound up dying from it, the concotion spread around the hip-hop scene in the southern US, taking several more lives in the process. Now it’s being marketed, hoorah! I can’t tell if this is just a culturally ignorant money-making venture, or a sly and calculated attempt to make certain sectors of society even more fucked up, but it certainly feels like a bad, bad idea all around.

Drank – for when you want to fall asleep at the party [DoseNation, via Gothamist]

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Ah, another shining example of humanity’s ability to show tolerance and love. Er, maybe not. Thanks to GayGamer, we have this lovely little example of why I really don’t give a flying fuck about playing online: Everyone’s a jerk. A Halo 3 player who goes by the gamertag of xxxGayBoyxxx (subtle!) has compiled some rather damning evidence of the lack of maturity commonly found in the grim cultural wasteland that is online gaming. I honestly cannot believe some of this, but it’s a proven fact that when you don’t have to look someone in the eye while you’re talking to them, all social filters (aka “politeness”) get tossed faster than an illegal immigrant when the feds start sniffing around.

Breaking: There Is No Shortage Of Homophobes On Xbox Live [Kotaku, via GayGamer]

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