Archive for the ‘weird news’ Category

Christine O’Donnell As Seen Via Taiwanese CG

October 13th, 2010 by frankie23

God, I really do love those newscasters. Admittedly, Crazy Christine is a bit of an easy target, but seriously, she deserves it. Plus, panda bears!

Colorful Christine electrifies Delaware Electorate [YouTube]

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November 25th, 2009 by frankie23


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Why don’t we get after-Hallowe’en statistics like this in Vancouver? I’m very curious as to how many crimes were committed by popular fictional characters. I’m pretty sure Boba Fett tried to roofie a friend of mine. Or was that me?

Later Batman Stated He Was “Sorry About The Window.” [Probably Bad News]

Freakish Snake-Monster-Thing Found And Killed

November 4th, 2009 by frankie23

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Okay, so I know I’m a few weeks (okay months) behind on this one, but I can’t just let it pass me by. In China, land of the really freaking bizarre, some old lady found this mutant snake that was sporting a full on leg. Crawling up her wall. So she killed it. From the article:

“I woke up and heard a strange scratching sound. I turned on the light and saw this monster working its way along the wall using his claw.”

She then proceeded to beat the thing to death with her shoe, and popped it into a jar of alcohol. You know, I know science would probably have loved to check this thing out, but frankly, I can’t blame the lady. If I woke up to see that freak of nature slowly creeping up my wall, I’d kill it faster than you can say “horrible snakey death”. Because I’d assume it was gunning for me. Of course.

Snake With Foot Found, Killed In China [Geekologie, via The Telegraph]

MST3K Presents Death By Bacon

February 4th, 2009 by frankie23


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Today in bacon news, we present the story of Mike Nelson, formerly the second-favourite host of beloved late-night movie show Mystery Science Theater 3000, and his ridiculous mission for the month of February. In his own words:

…for the entire month of February, 2009, I, Michael J. Nelson will eat nothing but bacon. Nothing, my friends, but bacon.

Major Mike is a sick, sick man, but I approve of his cause. Let us read farther for his reasoning behind this mad quest…

Why? Because bacon is nature’s finest and most nourishing food. Also, because several doubters on the RiffTrax staff had the unmitigated gall to insult bacon by making the outrageous claim that, as good as it is, no one could eat very much of it and live. I can and will. Therefore I will spend the month proving it.

Bravo, good sir, bra-vo. There’s nothing quite like doing something just to prove to a bunch of assholes on the internet that it can be done. Seriously, it takes a certain combination of chutzpah and balls-out (or vulva-out if you prefer) stubborness to dedicate yourself to a single form of food. He goes on to say he will not be using condiments either, which is astounded, though he does reserve the right to drink it up. Really, who are we to deny such a request?

Man Vows To Eat Only Bacon For A Month [Geekologie, via blog.rifftrax.com]

Bigfoot or bald bear?

October 31st, 2007 by frankie23

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RIDGWAY, Pa. – It’s furry and walks on all fours. Beyond that, about the only thing certain about the critter photographed by a hunter’s camera is that some people have gotten the notion it could be a Sasquatch, or bigfoot. Others say it’s just a bear with a bad skin infection.

Now, I’m no conspiracy nut; I know the council of Zion folded back in the Fifties, and I’m quite aware of why JFK needed to be put down like a mad dog. I understand these things. I try to make sure I only believe in ghosts when there’s definitely no chance of them being around, and I’m practical enough to not go looking for vampires at night because I don’t want to be rude. Bigfoot, however, has often been a thorn in my sensible side. It’s perfectly reasonable to believe that some sort of parallel to man’s evolution has survived into the modern age. Even considering how deep we’ve penetrated into Mother Nature’s fleshy, wooden womb, there’s still some small chance we’ve missed something. This is doubly reinforced by photos of the above. Can we tell what we’re looking at? No, not at all. However, when the agency spokesman for the Pennsylvania Game Commission, Jerry Feaser, speaks up and says, “There is no question it is a bear with a severe case of mange”, I just shake my head.

First off, there clearly is a question, otherwise we wouldn’t be discussing the point. Secondly, why couldn’t they get a real conservation officer to make this statement? Now, for comparison, look at that picture, and now look at this one:

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Very similar looking, yes? But, please notice, this mangey bear has lost all of it’s fur. The animal in the top photo clearly has fur on it; that’s not the bare (bear?) skin we can see on our poor little ursine. Is it possible that Mr. Feaser is correct? Of course it is. It’s also possible that he’s plumb wrong. The issue I personally have is how he’s not willing to give any leeway; it’s a very dark photo, and not one I’d feel comfortable making any definite statements about. Of course, the Bigfoot nuts aren’t any better. Paul Majeta of the Bigfoot Research Organization stated about the photo that “It appears to be a primate-like animal. In my opinion, it appears to be a juvenile Sasquatch”. I can’t get over this statement. Has the man ever seen a sasquatch? How would he know what a juvenile looks like? If it is indeed a simian, could it not just as easily be a chimpanzee or some other monkey that’s escaped it’s cruel masters and set out for a life of its own in the woods? Absolute statements are poopy, and make baby zombie Jesus cry.

Personally speaking, I like to think it’s a Bigfoot. It sure as hell doesn’t look like a mangy bear to me. This page on the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization’s site about the pics certainly doesn’t help the “bare bear” argument, showing another example of a mangy bear, as well as a very intriguing comparison picture between the mystery animal and a gorilla on all fours. Unfortunately they rather annoy me by having the same “I Know Better Than You” attitude as the agency spokesman, but they get some points back for not being government sock puppets. Further mysteries for our day, long to go unsolved, I’m sure. Certainly is interesting to think about though. Happy Hallowe’en!

Pa. hunter’s images stir Bigfoot debate [Yahoo! News]

Ninja girls rob gas station

September 26th, 2007 by frankie23

This weekend in Richland Township, Pennsylvania, 2 women dressed as ninjas held up a gas station by pointing a samurai sword at the clerk. Early Saturday morning, the suspects bound the female clerk with duct tape while held at swordpoint, and put her in a restroom. The security tape shows one of the women stealing cash from the register, then finding the key to a bottom safe and cleaning out the rolled coins. The ninja then attempted to open the top safe but, after failing that, the two girls then filled their bag with scratch-n-wins and cigarettes.

It’s really surprising to me that Pennsylvania has such a ninja problem, as less than three percent of the population is of asian decent. Obviously it’s not exactly necessary to be asian to be a ninja, but it’s certainly more common. As things stand though, these were very poor ninjas, getting caught on camera, operating in the daylight, and failing to get into the primary safe are all big mistakes. Hopefully their sensei sees this on the news and chastizes the errant students.

Ninja Girls Rob Gas Station [LiveLeak, via The Bougieman]

Dismembered again

September 6th, 2007 by frankie23

Once upon a time, the Panhandle city of Vernon was a national laughingstock. Its people were ridiculed as bumpkins and cranks, freaks willing to shoot off their own hands. Then things changed. Time and hard work helped bury the past, and now Vernon has reclaimed some of its dignity. If only that were the end of the story.

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And thus is the bizarre, heartbreaking story of Nubtown, Florida instroduced. Properly called Vernon, named after Geroge Washington’s Virginia home, Mt. Vernon, the city earned the name Nubville when, during the 50’s, there was a rash of suspicious amputations and limb-losses, so much so that insurance agencies started to refuse to offer policies to the residents. Those days are past, but the nickname lingers while the current occupants have tried to rebuild their town’s fallen image. The article is a moving tribute to some good people who’ve worked a long time to bring their town back, and who may lose it again, this time forever.

Dismembered Again [St. Petersburg Times]

Dark Powers succeed, Weekly World News is shuttered

July 23rd, 2007 by frankie23

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It’s a sad day for the people of Earth. One of our staunchest news sources, the people who were unafraid to print the real truth, has been taken out back for the final countdown. Yes, after twenty-seven years informing the globe about the dangers of Satan, alien involvement in world government, and really really fat people and animals, is closing, with no reason nor rhyme given, with their final published issue due August 3rd. One can only conclude that their brand of hard-hitting journalism was just too dangerous to the status quo in the locked-down, media-controlled USA. I give my thanks to these brave souls, and hope that they know that they will never be forgotten.

Weekly World News: Bat Boy Loses Home [Gambling911.com]