Archive for the ‘zombies’ Category
Oh, man, now this is the way I want to spend my post-zombie-apocalypse days… Gently sailing down the river, clockin’ zombies in the head from the safety of my giant fucking boat. Make sure you click on the image to see this thing in it’s full, grand beauty. The SS Huckleberry, winner of the 2010 Zombie Safe House Competition, (I didn’t even know such a thing existed!) is secure, has it’s own food production facilities, and is powered by diesel fuel made from decomposing undead! I mean, how wonderful is that? You stay alive, healthy, and your carbon footprint is vastly reduced! There is absolutely nothing I don’t like about that.
How do you scar your young children for life? Run them through a simulated zombie attack! Actually, it’s not such a bad idea… train the little buggers to be worth their weight when the big one comes. Good call Japan! You’ve proven your international value once again.
Playdate Of The Dead [The Stranger]
Truly an idea whose time has come. When the zombie apocalypse comes, when your back is to the wall and you have only seconds to clear a path through a horde of slavering undead ghouls, only a rocket-propelled chainsaw is gonna get your ass out of that fire. Just think about it; hot grinding death coming out of a tube at hundreds of miles an hour, ripping through necrotized flesh and bone as if the horde was a cloud of rotting cotton candy. From certain doom to sweet sweet freedom… at least until the next time you fuck up. Seriously, you let them corner you? Bah.
In an act of literary genius, author Seth Grahame-Smith has taken Jane Austen’s classic novel and done to it what all modern media needs: added more zombies! Just read this description from the listing on amazon.com:
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies features the original text of Jane Austen’s beloved novel with all-new scenes of bone-crunching zombie action. As our story opens, a mysterious plague has fallen upon the quiet English village of Meryton–and the dead are returning to life! Feisty heroine Elizabeth Bennet is determined to wipe out the zombie menace, but she’s soon distracted by the arrival of the haughty and arrogant Mr. Darcy. What ensues is a delightful comedy of manners with plenty of civilized sparring between the two young lovers–and even more violent sparring on the blood-soaked battlefield as Elizabeth wages war against hordes of flesh-eating undead. Complete with 20 illustrations in the style of C. E. Brock (the original illustrator of Pride and Prejudice), this insanely funny expanded edition will introduce Jane Austen’s classic novel to new legions of fans.
I highly approve of this concept, and encourage others to take a similar approach to updated other “classic” works of literature. Just think about it! David Copperfield and Zombies, Wuthering Heights is Filled with Zombies, Moby Dick Fights a Zombie, Great Zombie Expectations, A Tale of Two Cities Under Siege by Zombies… The ideas just spill out! Really, we all need more tales of zombies in our lives, if only to keep us on our toes for the inevitable Zombie Holocaust.
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies [Topless Robot]
Okay, lessee. Cute asian girls in cowboy hats, schoolgirl outfits, and skintight leather? Check. Said girls wielding big glowy swords or dual-fisted handguns? Check? Massive zombie massacreing? Check. Okay ladies and gents, I think we have a winner!
Oneechanbara is a movie based on a series of low-budget Japanese games which concentrate on too-hot-to-be-real women wearing strategically unsound outfits, who slaughter horde upon horde of zombies. Looks like there’ll finally be a video game movie which stays close to it’s source.
Craig Venter, the controversial DNA researcher involved in the race to decipher the human genetic code, has built a synthetic chromosome out of laboratory chemicals and is poised to announce the creation of the first new artificial life form on Earth.
The announcement, which is expected within weeks and could come as early as Monday at the annual meeting of his scientific institute in San Diego, California, will herald a giant leap forward in the development of designer genomes. It is certain to provoke heated debate about the ethics of creating new species and could unlock the door to new energy sources and techniques to combat global warming.
Well, it’s come down to this now. I mean, really, this is just not a good idea. We don’t really have much of a clue as to what we’re doing with genetics yet; as it is we’re basically monkeys fucking around in nature’s kitchen. Sure, we might manage to make some brownies, but it’s likely that those brownies will kill you. This is the beginning of the end, my friends. Next thing you know the dead will be rising from the earth, shopping for shoes and eating your skullfillings for a laugh. Zombies with fat asses, right next door. Think about that, won’t you?
I am creating artificial life, declares US gene pioneer [Guardian Unlimited]
Ah, you know, sometimes I long for the days of the Cold War, when people didn’t look at you like you were an absolute crazy person for wanting to build an impregnable shelter in your backyard. Now, of course, mine would be to protect against the inevitable outcome of Z-Day, but I suppose it’d be useful in a little nuclear holocaust or something. These images from a scanned brochure of for pre-fabricated fallout shelters, from the Kelsey-Hayes Company, of Detroit, MI circa 1963, really makes me think. About zombies. Enjoy!
In what is possibly one of the best videos I’ve ever seen in my life, on or off-line, 1500 Filipino prison inmates perform the zombie dance from Thriller. Please make special note of the very, homely looking inamte dressed as the girlfriend, and think of what he must’ve done to get that role. Also important to note is that this is just their practice session; one can only speculate on the wonder and glory that the final performance will be like.